Well I admit I am drunk as I write this, But as you must know; all the great writers were drunkards. I am sad. I just cried because Andrew wont let me suck his cock. Granted it is the middle of the fucken night and he was fast asleep. I just want sex. True fucking. I shouldnt put this in my journal but WTF anyway. Im trashed. I will miss him when he leaves me for a whole year. It will change the whole circumstance. At the moment I am wanting a divorce. God I loath him and his self righteous ways. He thinks he’s so goddamned perfect. Like he is such a good man. Because of the things he has done for me? SHIT! I am pissed! I am mad at him. I love that motherfucker but he is a prick. He doesn’t know me anymore. I am a lost personality to him. I wish he could remember... Or did he ever really know my true self? Was it just a lie? Shit. I know it was. But who wants to recognize their marriage is a scam. Not me. Pretend pretend pretend. I am lost to him. He says im crazy. Whatever. Maybe I am. But I wasn’t always. I used to be a princess. A woman among woman. I was his beauty. He loved me for ME! I was his. Now I have been regarded to his bitch. A piece of meat. ( I before E except after C... )

I can not spell for shit. God did not bless me there.

I am angry. I am mad at the world. For the fucks who rape kids and

 the assholes who steal from the poor to feed the rich. Motherfuckers.

I apologize. I need to cum in the worst way. Forgive me. I am an angry thing tonight. Sex has got the better of me, Father.

Now you see, but you do not know.......

Lets leave it that way.